IS THAT DOG TEACHING A HUMAN PUPPY TO CRAWL
"if you’re straight then why did you say she was hot"
yo i’m straight not blind
One time a nun at my school saw a hot guy and said “woah God did a nice job on that one” and we all looked at her like ??? and she goes “I’m allowed to look at the menu I just can’t order”
Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: “Jim’s whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.”
Why does this not have any notes?
lol no “Nashville sperm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. how may I help you?”
“Henderson’s Morgue, you stab em, we slab em, this is Eight Ball speaking.”
“Texas crematorium you kill ‘em we grill ‘em how can I direct your call?”
― Jarod Kintz (via psych-quotes)
my puppy is the cutest 😍
reblog before it’s 2015 guys
7:00 sunrise ☀️ (at Ridge Road)
"for a much as she stumbled, she's runnin, for as much as she runs, she's still here, always hopin to find somethin quicker than heaven to make the damage of her days disappear" ❤️